


Hey, Mom? I Mean, Mo– I MEAN CHIEF!

by myglassesaredirty



Category: Psych
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Gen, Sleep Deprivation, now get ready for calling your boss 'mom', you've heard of accidentally calling your teacher 'mom'
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-03-25
Packaged: 2019-12-07 04:02:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,223
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18229628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myglassesaredirty/pseuds/myglassesaredirty
Summary: Unfortunately, all of us know the painfully awkward experience of calling our teachers "Mom." Juliet O'Hara has all of us beat.





	Hey, Mom? I Mean, Mo– I MEAN CHIEF!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RobinsonsWereHere](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RobinsonsWereHere/gifts).



She is so pissed that Carlton got shot.

 

Now, part of it is because that means that some douchey perp tried to hurt her partner, but it also means that Lassiter is in the hospital, likely grumbling at the fact that Shawn and Gus are watching him to make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid, like rip out his IV and/or leave the hospital.

 

She would be lying if she said that was the main reason she was pissed that Carlton got shot.

 

No, the main reason she’s pissed is that  _ now _ she has to solve the case all on her lonesome in the middle of flu season, which is when criminals decide to up their criminal activity. She doesn’t know if it’s because they’re just mad at having the flu, and they need to take out their frustration somehow, but regardless, all of the beat cops are stretched thin, a few of the officers are leading more minor cases, and  _ she _ has to solve the biggest case they have open at the moment.

 

Do you know how long she’s gone without sleep? She doesn’t know. She thinks it’s been over a day.

 

Juliet rotates her neck, lifting her left hand to massage her shoulder. Over at the opposite end of the bullpen, Buzz turns his head into the crook of his elbow and coughs heartily. His coughs shake his body, and he leans against one of the pillars with his free hand. He doubles over, and Juliet pushes away from her desk, ready to grab a glass of water, but Buzz’s coughing fit fades, and his next breath comes with a wheeze.

 

Juliet narrows her eyes at him. He’ll be fine. Eventually. She drops back into her chair, buries her face in her hand, and stares at the case file. Letters and words swim before her eyes, the room dipping. If Shawn were here, he’d insist that she go home and rest up. He’d probably also make her take a Tylenol or something, but she’s not sick. She isn’t achy, nor is she running a fever. At least, she doesn’t think she’s running a fever. She wouldn’t be any the wiser.

 

She sighs heavily, pushes back from her desk again, and heads for the coffee machine. She needs something in her system, just enough to wake her up. She grabs the coffee pot, dumps what’s left into her mug, and makes a new pot, lest the chief have another breakdown like the time Iris wasn’t sleeping through the night.

 

Juliet sits back down, sips at her coffee, and blinks slowly, trying to make sense of anything. If only she had an anonymous tipster or a psychic or  _ something… _

 

Officer Dobson walks up to her desk. His nose is nearly cherry red, and he lifts his hand and wipes his nose with his clearly very dirty tissue. She does not want to know how many times he’s blown into it. “I’ve –” he pauses, and his eyes squint “– I think I’ve got –” he clenches his jaw and his mouth drops open a little bit “– I’ve got a– a– ACHOO!”

 

Juliet blinks, trying to open her eyes past half-lidded. “Bless you.”

 

Dobson sniffs and wipes his nose with his tissue again, crumpling it up and tossing it into the trash can by her desk. “Thank you.” He sniffles again and winces. “Do you have any hand sanitizer, by chance?”

 

Juliet furrows her brow and pulls out her middle drawer, digging around in it. She holds up three little bottles. “I have three different types, but they’re all girly smells.”

 

Dobson shakes his head and waves a hand in dismissal. “What do they smell like?”

 

Juliet frowns and reads each label, setting down each bottle as soon as she reads its scent. “Um…grapefruit, lavender, and vanilla cookies.”

 

“Vanilla cookies. Please.”

 

Juliet passes him the vanilla cookie hand sanitizer. “What were you going to say, Dobson?”

 

Dobson looks up, his eyes wide as he squirts the hand sanitizer onto his palm. “What?” He furrows his brow, and then he recalls what he came to her desk for. “Oh! I was going to say that I think I’ve got a lead.”

 

Juliet perks up, pressing her palms against the edge of her desk. “Really? What is it?”

 

Dobson closes the cap on the hand sanitizer and passes it back to her. “Well, it’s a bit of a long shot, but…our main suspect frequents a dive in the center of town. One of our witnesses on this case saw him walking into the bar. I don’t know if he’s still there.”

 

Juliet squirts hand sanitizer onto her palm, rubs it into her skin, and stands up abruptly. “Well, let’s go check it out.”

 

**

 

Thankfully, Dobson’s hunch turns out to be correct, and Juliet manages to wrestle a confession out of Herb Alexson. The penalty for shooting a cop isn’t generally good, and since he did admit in both writing and verbally, he’s going to have a tough time pleading anything except “guilty.”

 

Juliet fills out most of the paperwork, sending Dobson and other officers home early. I mean…not too early, of course. Justice still needs to be served. Though, if she had to be completely honest, Juliet’s thinking about asking the chief if they can bring in some old detectives – like Henry, Boone, and Peters – for consultation until the flu stops taking down their officers, but she’s not sure if it will fly with her.

 

Finally, Juliet finishes her paperwork, pushes away from her desk, and takes the papers to the chief’s office. She knocks on the door and shuffles inside. “Hey, Mom, can you sign these for me?” She pushes the papers at the chief, her eyes immediately widening as soon as she realizes what just happened.

 

Chief Vick just takes a sip of her coffee, clicks her pen, and grabs the stack of paperwork. “Sure, hon.” She looks up as well, and both of them have wide eyes.

 

Juliet gulps. “What just happened?” she asks, her voice rising approximately three octaves.

 

Chief Vick laughs. “I  _ think _ you just called me Mom, and I think I just called you ‘hon.’” She smiles at Juliet. “How much sleep have you gotten, Juliet?”

 

Juliet shrugs and massages her neck with the heel of her hand. “I don’t know…since what day? Because the answer really depends on that question.”

 

Chief Vick’s smile softens, and she gently sets the stack of papers on her desk. “You should go home, O’Hara. Santa Barbara should be fine, and if everything else fails, I’ll just get Henry and Psych to come in for a little bit.”

 

Juliet nods and slowly backs out of her office. “So you’re not mad about the whole calling you ‘Mom’ thing?”

 

The chief laughs. “Of course not. I find it endearing.”

 

Juliet winces. “Not disrespectful?”

 

Chief Vick shakes her head. “It’s quite the contrary.” She rests her fists on her desk and leans forward. “Go home, Juliet. And make sure you’re feeling okay. I don’t want another one of my officers to be down with the flu.”

 

Juliet nods and smiles. “Good. Right. I’ll, uh, I’ll do that.” She gestures vaguely with her hands. “I’m, uh, I’m sorry about calling you Mom, by the way.”

 

Karen waves a hand in dismissal. “It’s perfectly alright, O’Hara.”

**Author's Note:**

> Like it, love it, hate it? Leave a comment below or go to my tumblr, @ my-glasses-are-dirty, and tell me what you think!


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